Hallelujah, holy shit...where's the Tylenol?

Has anyone else noticed that the middle class is the new working class?

I realized it during the presidential campaign, when Obama released his 30-minute ad spot on TV just before the election. In it, he profiled (and bemoaned) the economic states of various families around the nation, how they were struggling to make ends meet and keep their heads above water. My initial reaction was, "Man, that sucks for them...how horrible," but then I thought about it for a second, and it hit me: "Holy shit. That's ME." I saw myself a little in each of the profiles. And we're not the only ones; a lot of people I know are in the same flimsy, leaky boat. Falling behind in paying bills? Check. Borrowing from Peter to pay Paul? Check. Living paycheck to paycheck? Check. Wondering how best to stew and serve old leather shoes? Not yet. But I'm not ruling it out.

It was an uneasy realization for someone who had grown up decidedly "middle class" and considered myself as still fitting comfortably into that niche. After all, I have a nice apartment, I always eat well-rounded, nutritious meals (thanks to James--if I were on my own, I'd probably be eating cereal for dinner every night), I have warm clothes. But in all reality, the real middle class nowadays are the people whose primary adjustment to the recession is to maybe vacation less and not eat out as often. And hey, great for them--I'm certainly not disparaging them for being better off. I'm glad they are; the fewer people struggling the better, and the middle and upper classes are integral in keeping the economy chugging along, however slugglishly, as it devolves.

But the working class? They (sigh...WE) are having to make some pretty substantial sacrifices, and are terrified of that one big unexpected bill or expense that will set them back for the next 6 months and threaten to force them to choose between food and medical care, or between electricity and clothes for the kids. And I have a great, stable job with a very decent salary. How must other families be surviving right now on less stable, lower-paying jobs? Even as I worry and fret, I feel lucky.

It's a strange gray area, this bizarre new purgatory between the middle and working classes. We seem to have all the trappings of the middle, but the tactical reality of the working. Most of us are surprised to find ourselves here, after living so long solidly in "the middle." But our country's social strata have changed. I'd wager there are more strata now, each with subtle differences but ultimately all fighting the same fight,  and that more and more people are being demoted into the lower and working classes as time goes on. Trickle-down economics, my ass.

Anyway, I was talking about this with a friend at work a few weeks ago, about how difficult times have gotten and how disappointed I was to not be able to really afford Christmas gifts for my friends and family (okay, I was totally whining), and despite his own precarious financial situation, his reaction was to selflessly and generously put what he thought would be an anonymous wad of cash on my desk when I wasn't around. Just like that. He saw someone struggling just as much as he was, and instead of doing nothing, he gave. He gave what he probably didn't really have to give. And I was floored and humbled. His only condition was that I "pass it forward" and help someone else.

And that's where you, my nine faithful readers, come in. I've yet to pass it forward--not because I'm lazy or don't give a shit, but because I haven't decided just how to do so yet. I want it to be worthy of the generosity that was shown to me. I have a couple of ideas, but I want to put it to you as well: any ideas? Have you done anything lately to help those less fortunate around you? Do you know of something or someone that could really use some help? Do tell. And even though James and I may only be able to take on one or two of the ideas, sharing them here with everyone else (you know, my other 8 readers) might inspire them to do something as well, and soon we'll ALL be reaching out to others.

It'll be awesome! Like a stadium wave, but one of giving instead of sports mania, and without the loud fat guys in body paint and big foam rubber fingers. Unless you know someone who needs that. But I doubt it.

Comments

[Nick K.]

Random thoughts:

Like it. I think that is a good statement regarding shifting of classes. As financial goodness increases (as it has for the last 30 years) more layers are created along the way. There are all kinds of situations, not just the bottom, middle and top, but probably more like 10 layers. The funny thing is that people cant differentiate more than 3, so those that are in 4-7 think they are 'middle' but could be worlds apart. This lack of being able to differentiate also caused plenty of folks to over-leverage to get the things of the 'upper' class(es).

Secondly on the giving side, I like the encouragement to be more thoughtful ('pay it forward' is played though ;)). We should have two types of giving in my mind:

1. Random daily giving. I would recommend getting up every day, and remind yourself to look for opportunities, ie the guy on the street you pass with a sign, or a friend who says they are down. It takes boldness (which requires the morning forethought)

2. Regular giving with time, energy and money. This is more like a commitment to an organization to give of time, and/or money. Here are some ideas: http://www.dontalmostgive.org/

We really need both types. Adopt both.

That being said, thats a nice ideal and a nice post (meaning my post), but it takes more. We all have, like film on our teeth, selfishness and desire for our own comfort, whether financial, rest, time, etc. Its hard to give regularly. Its hard to turn off the TV (our new social mediator). It doesnt always 'feel good' to give. Its easier to do nothing. But we need to get back to commitment and commitment to looking out daily.

[Bird]

I would love to be able to give more of my time and energy to a worthy cause. Unfortunately the baby is sucking the life out of me and, I suspect, everyone within a five mile radius of our tiny Brooklyn abode. I hear you about living paycheck to paycheck, especially since Dan will be quitting one of his jobs in January in order to spend more time with us. Even so, every year we snag a couple of tags from the giving tree at our church. We avoid the ones with requests for iPods and flat screens and go for the kids who humbly ask for things like jackets. And books. We try to throw in something extra, too, because my God...the kid asked for a jacket.

[Aleta Fullenwider]

My husband quit his job last January to go back to school full time. We had to go on a budget which used to be a dirty word in our house. So in a way, I think I'm very lucky because I've all ready gotten used to giving up a lot of the luxuries like eye brow waxing, going out to eat, and a steady supply of new (or almost new) clothes.
So with that, I don't have a lot of money to spare. But I have some time. I went to the Oregon Foodbank in November to volunteer and they have times set aside that you can go with a few friends and help out. But one visit isn't enough. I need to do more. Rather than try to come up with New Year's Resolutions that I will never stick to, I am only making one:to actively volunteer time. I haven't figured out exactly how I will do this consistently but I am working on a plan.

Good luck to all of you!

[Sarah Rader]

I can't stop thinking about this post. It's a wake up call for me realizing exactly what you've recently realized. (That is an obnoxious sentence.) But I'll keep working, because really, what else am I going to do?
As for paying it forward, what an amazing person you work with. Since I can't give money or gifts, I give time. I'll clean a friend's house or watch their kids for a day. Hope you have a very Merry Christmas.